The point of male rites of passages is to bring a boy into adulthood (Raphael, 1988, p.10). In order for the rite of passage to work, all boys must participate in it to create a sense of collective identification (p.11). Rites of passages are necessarily dramatic and public in order to guide one’s initiation, and give it support and legitimacy (p.12). When participating in these rituals as part of one’s socialization, boys are required to assume their social obligations to society once the initiation is complete (p. 10).
While cultures all over the world have different rites of passages as displayed by this blog, Western culture has a hard time defining its own. Most people in Canada and the U.S. are likely to consider one’s first time driving, drinking, voting, having sex or joining the military as examples of rites of passages (Raphael, 1988, p. 20; Larson & Martin, 2012, p. 38). However, these milestones can be achieved by both men and women, and fails to provide a common initiation to manhood that all boys go through.
Without a rite of passage, boys are constantly insecure in their masculinity as they can never be sure when they have reached manhood (Raphael, 1988, p. 19). This results in confusion and uncertainty, and encourages competitiveness between men (p. 184). Because no one can ever be sure if they are a man, there is a need to constantly prove one’s masculinity by being better than other men (p. 184). There is also a fear that if a man is not masculine enough, he will be blamed and discarded for someone more masculine (p. 189).
In addition, the lack of a ritual into manhood has forced boys to rely on the adoption of hegemonic masculinity in an attempt to define masculinity. The current form of hegemonic masculinity requires men to be strong, independent, authoritative and competitive, and looks down on qualities considered to be feminine such as compassion, empathy, and nurturance.
However, because hegemonic masculinity encourages an ideal that does not represent the actual experience of men and boys, very few of them actually achieve this goal which further reinforces the fragility of masculinity (Connell, 2001, p. 40). In fact, most men perform a complicit masculinity that reinforces hegemonic masculinity as they still benefit from it (p. 40).
As a result, there is a sense of nostalgia for primitive notions of masculinity that rely on hunter and warrior narratives (1988, p. 20; Larson & Martin, 2012, p. 39), and men romanticize traditional masculinity that was considered to be “strong[,] wild and real” (Raphael, 1988, p. 20). Many men blame marginalized groups for threatening their rights as men which could explain the recent surge of men’s groups and alt-right groups in North America who are actively working to restore traditional models of nuclear families and masculinity.
The lack of a ritual also results in no marker for maturity (Larson & Martin, 2012, p. 37), so the distinction between being a man and a boy is blurred. Raphael argues that this is one of the reasons that adolescence is now considered to be a stage of life (1988, p. 17).
These concerns around masculinity contribute to what is called the “crisis of masculinity” by many despite the fact that it is not actually a crisis (Connell, 2001, p. 45).
Within this “crisis”, boys and men are frantically trying to hold on to any traditional aspects of being a man with an intense grip due to fear. Anything that questions their manhood is a threat.
Masculinity’s fragility is shown through consumer products marketed directly towards men as well as people’s observations of male behaviours. These Buzz Feed articles shows how boys and men attempt to display and protect their masculinity in a society that does not have an actual definition of what it is or how to achieve it.
While all these points suggest that rites of passages are necessary to restore masculinity, I suggest that they are just further proof of how much work still needs to be done in dismantling traditional, toxic notions of masculinity. If boys and men were given space to explore their masculinity and femininity without judgement and fear, the need for a concrete definition of masculinity would not be necessary. The lack of a rite of passage for men in Western culture could be a step in the right direction that will help dismantle gender binaries and inequalities.
References:
Connell, R. W. (2001). The social organization of masculinity. In Whitehead, S. M. & Barrett, F (Eds.), The Masculinites Reader (pp. 30-50). UK: Polity.
Larson, S., & Martin, L. (2012). Risk taking and rites of passage. Reclaiming Children and Youth, 20(4), p. 37-40. Retrieved from http://proxy.lib.sfu.ca/login?url=https://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=aph&AN=71849817&site=ehost-live
Raphael, R. (1988). The men from the boys: Rites of passage in male America. USA: University of Nebraska Press.